The Barna Group found in its latest study that born again Christians who are not evangelical were indistinguishable from the national average on the matter of divorce with 33 percent having married and divorced at least once. Among all born again Christians, which includes evangelicals, the divorce figure is 32 percent, which is statistically identical to the 33 percent figure among non-born again adults, the research group noted.

Well, divorice rates in general these days are as high as 50%! I am not surprised that the Christian divorce rate is 33%... I believe that if you are struggling in a marriage and you are miserable, it is better to not live with that person. I'm sure God wouldn't want you to live your whole life miserable and falling out of love with someone.

Being in love with someone is a gift from God. I believe that God wants us to have relationships so that we can get a taste of His love for us! I believe that in a RIGHT relationship, you are able to do exactly that.

It is also damaging to the children in the marriage if they are always exposed to fighting, physical/verbal abuse, etc. Children need a safe and stable environment when they are young so that their moral development is sound and stable.

I think God just wants us to be happy.

Our relationships and marriages need to include God and have Him as the main focus. The devil simply wants us to abort the plan/purpose God has for us. Relationships are meant to function a certain way--a perfect example would be the Trinity. The Trinity itself is a relationship, a community. In the same way, our relationships with each other need to be a community with God. If we exclude God and try to "love" others by ourselves with our own flesh, we will fail and the relationship will fail.

Also, our generation is all about getting what we want, whenever we want. If something doesn't work, we just throw it away or let it perish. Ultimately, we don't want to work or suffer to make something right.

3 reasons: People have a distorted perception of "Love", people have a distorted perception about marriage in general, and because culture teaches us to give on things that we dont deem worth while.

There is no picture perfect image to represent the fairytale wedding/marriage society deems as good. Our standards fall too short of God's, and so, the only perfect relationship presented would be found in the bond we share with Christ. The marriage that Christ portrays, is ideal of what God wants. No flaws, all love, and undiscerning of faults or blemishes our spouse might have. Just as He loves us, we should love others...

The truth of the idea is that man is not perfect, and so no matter how uniquely special a couple can seem to be, one can truly not know how another person is until you marry them and live with them. It is through the revelation of experiences encountered that regulate the toxicity of the relationship. The strength of the love bond that is shared between man and woman is often tested, and there are times when incidents will occur that will not respond as the way one had hoped at the start of a relationship.
That is, fights happen, harsh words spoken, and emotions run high. The expectation that one party is more correct than another, or for any other odd reason that seems one-sided, is the commonality that shows that problems fester only when left unresolved. With proper care by a neutral party, and proper guidance, christian marriages would ideally prosper if cared in a more proactive way.

The reasons behind divorce are all different. It does happen, but the hope is that whatever hole that divorce might have caused, Christ's love being all perfect, and sufficient would restore all that was lost.
Being married for 8.5 years, you learn to pick your battles.

I'm not married so I can't really speak from that experience. But as the child of divorced parents who were both divorced once before, and as a born-again Christian I think that today's divorce issues stems from the lack of proper teaching from churches, parents, and leaders.

Today we have a misunderstanding of what love and marriage is. We think that love is about feeling good. We equate love with infatuation, affection, and eroticism. God does not. 1 Corinthian 13’s definition of love (and this is not exclusive to spouses) is full of adjectives and verbs but never once does it describe feelings. Love is being patient even when you want to blow someone’s head off. Love is being kind, even when you feel like being mean. Love is not envying even when you feel slighted. Love is not boasting even when they’re wrong and you’re right. Love is not being proud and admitting to your faults and mistakes. Love is not being rude even when they’re rude to you. Love is not being self-seeking, even when you have to give up yourself. Love is not being easily angered no matter what the provocation. Love is keeping no record of wrongs, and not holding someone’s past against them. Love is not delighting in evil but rejoicing with the truth, no matter how hard the truth is to hear. Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love is an action, it is a choice, a habit, a struggle, and a way of life. It is not a feeling. And marriage is the promise to love. More than that it is the covenant to love. In Old Testament times, whenever people made a covenant with each other (which didn’t happen all that often), they would cut an animal in half and walk through it. This symbolized “may this be done to me if I should ever break the covenant.”

Marriage likewise is a covenant and must be held with the same deference. Marriage is the promise to love the other person no matter what happens and no matter how you feel. That’s why I have a problem with a lot of people getting married and using the famous vows, “to have to hold, sickness and health, etc.” The problem I have is that people just gloss over it and don’t mull over what it really means. Saying it has just become a ritual. But God never intended that. Marriage is making a vow before God saying I promise to love this person no matter what and if I don’t, God you have every right to punish me for breaking this covenant. And I don’t think that people who really know God want to make that promise lightly.

God wants us to be what he made us to be: reflectors of His image. That’s why Ephesians talks about wives and husbands like Christ and the Church. It wasn’t just because it was a good analogy, but because marriage was meant to be both an experience of God’s love as well as a way to show the world God’s love. While non-Christians get married and divorced based on feelings and emotions and circumstances, they ought to be able to look at Christians who stay together and despite their own selfishness and comfort and no matter what happens, make it work, they’re suppose to think “is that like God’s love for me?”

And then for those who are married they experience God’s love. But not a warm-fuzzy feeling. They experience God’s difficult love by loving that person who isn’t perfect. By being there and being faithful even when they don’t want to. By sacrificing and giving, just as God did for us.

I think that the a good example is in Isaac and Rebekah. In Genesis 24, God recounts the story of them getting together. It ends with verse 27: “Then Isaac brought her into the tent of Sarah his mother and took Rebekah, and she became his wife, and he loved her.”

Marriage as compatibility? They never met each other and all Isaac knew was the Rebekah liked to water camels. Marriage as affection and eroticism? They’ve never even seen each other. The reason they got married was simple. It was God’s will.

Then it says something interesting: and he loved her. If God meant that they had sex, I’m fairly certain that he would have used one His many euphemisms like “he layed with her” or “he knew her”. No, I believe that God used the word love here specifically because that’s what Isaac did. Isaac at that moment chose to love Rebekah. Even when she tricks him into giving the inheritance to the wrong son (check a few chapters later) he still loves her. Even when they’re circumstances are tearing them apart, he loves her. Even when they’re old and wrinkly, he loves her. Now granted there’s a bit of a polygamy problem at this time, but the idea is the same.

Why is there so much divorce in the church? Because Christians have bought into society’s definition of love and marriage, instead of God’s definition. We think of love as a feeling and we think that the basis of marriage is that feeling. We forget that for God, His love never had anything to do with feeling. In fact, on the cross, His love had to overcome feeling. That love, God’s love, is the basis of what our marriages should be. In light of that love, in trying to reflect that love, in being overwhelmed by that love, how can we as Christians even contemplate divorce?

This is not a reply to the topic, but on the subject of marriage, does anyone know of any Christian marriage conferences in the area? I know there's that Singled Out conference coming up for single people. I have married friends that are interested. Thanks!

I believe that the devil wants to undermine anything that is created and sanctified by God. Marriage is an oath made before God. A healthy marriage leads to healthy lives, healthy children and even a healthy ministry. Of course the devil is going to do everything in his power to destroy and divide such a blessed union! John 10:10 says, "The thief comes to steal, kill and destroy." Married Christians are not immune.

Factors such as personality, finances and in-laws can contribute to marital woes, but these can usually be worked out if a husband and wife are willing. What's more difficult and insidious are the temptations and pitfalls that Satan throws at them. It is so important to recognize this and pray for protection over one's marriage.

My opinion is not related to Christian Divorce, but I want to talk about this topic.
Each person has different value about marriage.

Like, when I should marry, who I should marry to, why I should marry are the things that are different for everybody.
Marriage is like service covenant during the rest of life.
We have to protect partner and live together wheter partner become disability or poor.

Nowadays, It gradually become late that people attain the age of discretion.
It's because people are getting into working life later than before, but also children of this society are too busy with studying, they don't have enough time for self-realization. The fact that it's so much easier to live a life in this century, it doesn't help a person to mature from overly cared.

And that is why divorce rate is gradually getting higher than before.

I would be interested to know how many of the Christians that went through divorce were involved in a marriage with a non-Christian. This may have something to do with the inability for a continued relationship.

If it is the case that these divorces were between Christians, then it is obvious that the lukewarm condition of modern Christians is what makes them indistinguishable from unbelievers. Also, simply because a person may have claimed themselves a Christian for these polls is no proof of what they think and believe concerning marriage, divorce, and re-marriage.

There are many churches today that teach that divorce is an acceptable practice. This is in contradiction to the passages of the New Testament that teach that divorce may only be for the exception of fornication. When Christians begin espousing other excuses that they consider acceptable, they will of course use it when they want to get out of a relationship, especially when things are not going as they perceive a marriage should.

The best preventative measure is for all to consider these pitfalls before getting married.